There are squirrels that keeps trying to break into my house.

They are devious, malicious, they take no prisoners, and if they succeed in their plans for world conquest, the world will be enveloped in darkness for millenia. I have tried to prevent this from happening, by fattening them up enough to make them sluggish, but it doesn't work, as they are too clever for that simple of a scheme. I fear that it is only a matter of time until they rally their forces and attack en masse and I will be overwhelmed. I am the last line of defense this world has against these evil and naughty fiends. So, as I sit in the darkness listening to them plot their evil plots and scheme their evil schemes, I know that the word must go out. The fight must be carried on.

WE MUST NOT LET THEM WIN!!!